Runaway Justice
by Lawnmowergirl
Summary: AU. In which a mutant and a lawyer, both ten sweeps old, attempt to topple the Alternian caste system and become matesprits in the process. Karezi, Erifef, caliginous Tavris. Related stuff will be posted at l1br4. tumblr. com/ tagged/ runaway-justice
1. Tempest

An electrical discharge in the atmosphere of the planet Alternia jolted one of its denizens from a fitful sleep. Ordinarily such a storm in the middle of the day would be soothing, but this one was too close and too loud for his already frayed nerves. Every flash of lightning threatened to break through the safety barriers that were his hive's curtains, although their light would have done no damage.

One Karkat Vantas, ten sweeps old and the troll in question, pulled himself up out of his recuperacoon and pulled on his clothes after drying off. Even though he was indoors, he pulled his hood over his head from force of habit. It helped hide his eyes, which by now were fully pigmented and constantly threatened to give him away.

He briefly contemplated going for a walk, but he didn't trust the anti-UV lotion he'd bought well enough to think it would keep the harsh Alternian sun from burning his flesh off. It was midday, after all, when the sun would be at its brightest. So he settled for sitting on the shitty couch in his hive's main block. It had been picked up on a street corner in a nearby lawnring. It had had to be - he couldn't possibly get the credit needed to buy furniture, not with his blood color.

The storm started to abate as Karkat grew drowsier. His tired eyes began to close of their own accord, and the next thing he knew, he was lying on the shitty sofa with a puddle of drool in his hood and someone was knocking on his front door. It took him a moment to realize it, because at first he was simply glad he'd been mercifully spared by the horrors that so often plague a soporless sleep.

"Open this door immediately!" came a voice from outside. "You are under arrest!"

Oh, _shit._


	2. Confrontation

Karkat tugged the red-gold hood of his coat back on, pulling it as far over his eyes as he could without truly obstructing his vision. His thoughts were racing furiously as he wondered what could have happened. He'd been so careful…

"I swear, you've got the wrong troll!" he shouted as he opened the door, "I swear I haven't fucking killed anyone, let alone someone I shouldn't ha-"

But he could tell by the razor-sharp grin forming on the face of the legislacerator standing in front of him that he had guessed wrong.

"You're definitely not a wiggler, now are you?"

So that was it. Karkat should have known he couldn't get away with living on-planet forever. But there was no way he could have left - he would have had paperwork to fill out for the transport ships; they would have checked his blood… He found himself staring at the red veil sewn into her hood. He'd never seen anything like it before. Could she see through it?

The legislacerator, who was ever so slightly taller than Karkat, whipped out a cane and brandished it at him, the point to his neck. He took a step backward, and she took a step forward. Again, again, until they were both inside Karkat's hive.

She shut the door with her free hand.

Oh, shit.

"Look, nooksniffer, I didn't fucking do anything!" Karkat growled.

There was a momentary slip in the legislacerator's almost predatory confidence. He almost thought he heard her mutter something, maybe "no, you didn't".

She grabbed the folds of fabric covering his neck and pulled him towards her. She seemed to be smelling his face. He wondered why the fuck she was doing that. Was she trying to intimidate him? Somehow this strange behavior seemed oddly familiar…

"Sir, what is your name and blood color?" she asked.

"Karkat Vantas, m-maroon, ma'am." Maroon was a practiced lie for him, but anyone would be nervous under these circumstances, so she had no need to suspect him just because he was becoming anxious, right? Right…?

She sniffed again. "That's hoofbeast shit and you know it. Remove your hood."

Karkat raised his hands slowly. His life, short and mostly miserable, was flashing before his eyes, making it hard to concentrate.

"I said, remove your hood." The legislacerator moved her cane away from his throat and tapped it on the floor impatiently.

Karkat leapt into action. His hands flew to specially reinforced pockets to draw his sickles.

But they were immediately knocked from his grip with a deft swipe of the legislacerator's cane. One sliced his hand on its way to the floor.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.


	3. Recognition

Her hand darted forward to grasp his bleeding wrist. As she stepped toward him, the rustling of her tabard filled his ears.

Without hesitation, she drew his hand to her mouth and licked the cut. Her manic grin returned in full force, and Karkat squirmed when her tongue scraped the softer skin of his palm.

"Gah, stop it! Why the fuck are you doing that!"

Without a word, and without releasing her grip, the legislacerator reached up to remove her hood, revealing wide, sightless eyes the same bright red as Karkat's mutant blood.

She was about to explain, but Karkat cut her off, suddenly remembering. "So," he said, his voice filled with a calmness he certainly didn't feel, "did your lusus ever hatch…Terezi?"

She gasped, and her shit-eating grin faded instantly. She, too, was remembering, but not with the frantic clarity of mortal terror. "I thought your name sounded familiar…" she said.

Terezi let go of Karkat's wrist but still eyed him warily.

When they were been six sweeps old, they had been good friends, talking to each other frequently on Trollian. Karkat knew about Terezi's blindness and how it had been inflicted by a former FLARP buddy of hers as an act of revenge. He had even been considering confiding in her about his true blood color, but never ended up telling her. When they came of age, they lost track of each other, mostly because Karkat had been forced to hide on Alternia after he became an adult so he wouldn't be culled for his mutant blood.

"When I got the report about an adult of unknown blood color living suspiciously close to a juvenile lawnring on-planet, I never in a million sweeps would have guessed it would be _you…_" Terezi said, leaning on her cane.

Tentatively, Karkat began to reach towards his fallen sickles, as slowly and surreptitiously as he could.

"Uh-uh-uh. Oh, Karkles, what makes you think I'd let you do that?" she chuckled slightly and returned her cane to its former position, pointing straight at his neck.

Karkat smiled in spite of himself, not something he did often. He'd always hated that nickname, but now it brought him back to better days. Not for the first time, he took a moment to wonder who the fuck had been so absolutely fucking shithive maggots that they thought a society based entirely on the hemospectrum was a good idea. He'd like to go back in time and snap that bulgelicker's neck.

Come to think of it, Terezi hadn't reacted to the revelation of Karkat's blood color at all like he'd expected someone would. Had she already known somehow…? No, that wasn't possible, was it?

His train of thought was interrupted by a not unpleasant cackling laugh. So that was what the "H3H3H3" she'd so often typed sounded like…

This was starting to look like an as-yet-undeclared stalemate, although Karkat knew Terezi would have the upper hand if it came to blows again.

"Let's cut the crap, Terezi," he said, hiding fear behind frustration, "What's going to happen to me?"


	4. Accord

Terezi seemed to be thinking about it. "In theory," she said pensively, "I take you into custody, and you'll almost certainly be culled as soon as all of the relevant paperwork has been submitted and approved. But I don't know, Karkles…lately, I've started to wonder…"

Karkat was almost too busy marveling at how she'd been able to go back to referring to him as that after so many sweeps like it was nothing and like she wasn't going to send him to his death to realize that she was still talking.

"…so I don't think I will." Terezi gave her old friend a conspiratorial wink, then laughed again.

Karkat was pretty sure he knew what she was referring to, but… "How do I know you're not just fucking with me?"

"Were you even listening?" Terezi laughed yet again, good-naturedly as far as he could tell. "I pretty much did everything short of proposing a matespritship…you really weren't listening, were you, when I detailed my reasons for deciding to spare your life?"

Karkat blinked. Matespritship? He realized just then how lucky he'd been to escape being found by imperial drones. And, come to think of it, if he was being honest with himself, Terezi was prettier than he'd ever imagined her being, and she'd always been the only one he felt could actually genuinely stand him…

"And not even a 'hello' for your wigglerhood friend? Oh, Karkles, you're just as rude as ever." She smiled pleasantly. "But in the end, it really all comes down to whether or not you _think _you can trust me…and whether you're truly innocent, as you say you are."

Karkat didn't like the look on her face when she said that. It was…unnerving. But this really was his only chance, and frankly he was glad it was Terezi standing in front of him offering him the possibility of survival, and not any of those other nooksniffers he'd grown up with.

"So…what do you say, Karkat? Are you in? Do you think you can trust me? Do you want to live?"

"Of course I want to fucking live. Now, you'd better have a goddamned plan."


	5. Loneliness

Elsewhere, under the sea in fact, a young prince paced back and forth across his suitably fancy respiteblock. He didn't like being here. Every breath was a struggle, thanks to his poorly-formed gills. He wheezed a little bit with each step.

He would have had no problem putting up with this difficulty breathing for the sake of being with his matesprit-to-be, who almost never left the ocean, but there was no way he could see her now. They simply wouldn't let him.

And that was exactly why Eridan was pacing. Oh, sure, official word was that she was refusing contact from outside the very tightest Imperial circle, but he knew that didn't make any sense. There was no way Feferi Peixes would isolate herself like that, and if she did, she would never sever her ties with Eridan.

When he reached the window again, he stopped to stare out at the sea around his temporary place of residence. It was murky today, much like his thoughts…

Eridan strode back over to the wardrobe, swung its gilded doors open, and pulled out his favorite scarf. It hung limply in the water, swaying slightly in the current. He would have liked to wear it, but it only made it harder to breathe down here.

Suddenly, the intercom buzzed. _Go away, I'm very busy!_ thought Eridan, but he answered it anyway, on the off chance it might be Feferi. He really, really hoped it would be Feferi.

Needless to say, it wasn't. The voice that met his ear slits was that of an imperial messenger.

"Um, Mr. Ampora? I have an important message for you from Her Imperious Condescension directly…" He sounded fearful, as if he thought Eridan would open the door and greet him with a harpoon in the face. And he had every right to be fearful, if Eridan's suspicions about the contents of the message were right.

He opened the door, still holding his scarf in one hand. He didn't have his harpoon gun, but he was certainly ready to punch the messenger in the face if need be. "Wwhat is it?" he rasped. Damn was it hard to breathe while talking.

The young troll said nothing, just handed him an electronic memo and stepped away, rubbing his fins nervously. He couldn't have been more than seven sweeps old, and he looked like he didn't want to be here any more than Eridan did. He almost started to regret having contemplated punching him.

The memo snapped on and the Condesce's familiar but always threatening face filled its screen. Or, really, her hair did. Eridan shut his eyes as soon as he could, to avoid exposure to subliminal messaging.

"We regret to inform you," she began, sounding anything but regretful, "that the arrangement of your matespritship with Feferi Peixes has been terminated due to political reasons. You may not contest this. Have a nice day."

Eridan opened his eyes and flung the memo at a nearby wall. Its screen cracked, water seeped in, and it made pathetic fizzling noises. It probably would have caught on fire if this hadn't been taking place underwater.

The imperial messenger was cowering by the opposite wall, but Eridan was too angry now to feel sorry for him. He shooed him away and slammed the door so hard it shook the wall and created waves that threatened to sweep the contemptible knickknacks off their shelf.

He stomped over and smashed them against a wall. Good. He'd never wanted them anyway. How he longed to be back in the hive he grew up in! At least there he could breathe properly!

Yes, his matespritship with Feferi had been arranged for political reasons, but cod dammit, he genuinely really, really, _really _pitied her, and he suspected she was beginning to feel more flushed than pale for him as well.

Eridan glared, furious and despondent, at the shards of porcelain and glass on the opulent tiled floor of his respiteblock. _His _respiteblock, ha! It was more like a fancy prison cell without the possibility of Fef coming to visit, possibly ever again. She might be dead, for all he knew!

"Wworst day evver!" he screamed, kicking at the broken knickknacks.

This outburst wasted valuable oxygen, and it took several minutes before he was certain he wasn't going to pass out.


	6. Consent

"Of course I have a plan, Karkles!" Terezi pouted. "Look, what we need to do is this: I'm going to handcuff you and bring you outside…"

"How the actual fuck will that accomplish anything other than getting me culled? Unless that's been your plan all along-"

"I wasn't finished! If I lead you away from the designated law enforcement four-wheeled device, the other legislacerators will understand…"

"Understand what?" The question was sharp, impatient.

"Oh, Karkles, for someone who uses so much foul language, you certainly can be naïve…"

"Don't fucking call me naïve!" Karkat snapped.

Terezi giggled, then her face took on a serious expression. "Some legislacerators," she said, sniffing disdainfully, "make it a habit of…" She paused, shuddering, and then restarted her sentence. "Some legislacerators make it a habit of detaining suspects _personally_."

"Wait, what are you…Oh, god. Ugh, that's disgusting. Wait, are you going to-!" Karkat nearly ran to grab his sickles off the floor.

Terezi smacked him across the arms with her cane before he could even kneel to pick them up. "No. The others do, I don't. It disgusts me, and honestly I'd like to hang each and every one of them for it. But now I'm kind of glad I never made this opinion known, because now we'll need all the help we can get to make them think I intend to have my way with you."

"Wait just a fucking minute," Karkat fumed, "So you mean to tell me that your plan is for us to convince those nooksuckers you're going to pail me and then make our escape?"

Terezi felt her bloodpusher do something strange when Karkat said 'you're going to pail me'. She shook the thought away. "Basically, yes."

"You must be absolutely shithive maggots to think that would _ever_ actually fucking work! If that plan was a troll, it would have been culled as a grub for being completely out of its pathetic goddamned thinkpan!"

"You're just jealous because you didn't think of it first." Terezi grinned.

Karkat grumbled.

Terezi pulled a pair of handcuffs out of a pouch on her belt and prepared to snap them onto his wrists. "Ready, Karkles?"

"It's not like I have a choice."


	7. Unpleasantness

When Terezi ushered Karkat outside, he saw the small group of other legislacerators standing idly around a four-wheeled device. They were each garbed much like Terezi, in bright red and their respective blood colors. She pulled him towards them. "Act angry," she whispered to him. "You can do that no problem, right?"

"Whatcha got there, Pyrope?" The nearest one, a greenblood with long, curved horns, was the first to speak.

"Just a maroonblood living in the wrong zone, like we suspected. Sorry it took so long, he's quite…ornery. But of course he didn't manage to land a single hit."

"We figured as much," said her yellowblooded colleague. "So, hey, for once are you gonna…?"

"Actually, yes." Terezi grinned lasciviously and pulled Karkat closer to her.

"Whoa, fuck!"

"Haha, good for you," the greenblood said. "I don't think I'd pail him, though. He's kinda scrawny, and just look at those nubby little horns he's got. But I suppose it's really just a matter of taste. Haha, get it, _taste_?" He thought it was hilarious, and Terezi pretended to think so too.

She licked Karkat's face once, slowly, mostly for effect but obviously enjoying it. He squirmed.

"When d'ya think you'll get back?" asked the yellowblood.

"Oh, this might take a few hours…" Terezi replied.

Karkat could tell she wanted to smash these two nooksuckers' faces in. At least he thought she did. Oh, he, really, really fucking hoped she did.

"You two can head back to HQ now. I'll make my own way back and meet you there later."

Terezi dragged Karkat off away from her coworkers, him shouting "Where the grubsucking fuck are you taking me?"

As soon as the other legislacerators had gotten in their two-wheeled device and driven away, Terezi answered with a question. "…Is the back of your hive visible to anyone?"

"No, it's not. I made absolutely fucking sure to find a place as far away from any other hives as possible because I wanted to avoid this kind of shit happening."

"Good. For now, we're going there. We'll sit there and formulate our plan."

"I thought you already had a plan."

"I did, Karkles. That plan has been completed, and now it's time for another plan."

"Here's hoping this one doesn't involve making me want to rip anyone's thinkpan out and shove it down their fucking throat."

"Yes, I agree." Terezi shuddered. "That was a really unpleasant experience for both of us. Those two deserve the noose for what they've done, but it's not like I can do anything about it."


	8. Captivity

Feferi Peixes woke up in a cage. She was lying on her side, still wearing the custom-tailored gown she'd been trying on last morning; she was going to wear it to go and surprise Eridan by visiting him unannounced -

Oh. How could she get there if she was in this cage? She couldn't think properly at the moment. Her thoughts were blurry, unfocused, like a poorly-calibrated spyglass.

Feferi screamed. Her voice reverberated wildly through whatever room she was in. It was too bright for her to see the walls, but they must have been close.

Where was she? For a second, she thought to call for her maidservant, but that was stupid. As if she would be here! At the thought of her, her face appeared in Feferi's mind, and she began to feel lonely. When she realized that, she noticed suddenly that her ever-present cuttlefish were…gone.

She was truly alone.

Feferi began to cry, translucent magenta leaking into the water around her. The tears were quickly swallowed up, dissolving into the sea like a single drop of food coloring in a bathtub.

This didn't make her feel better. It only made her painfully aware of her own impermanence, and the feeling she sometimes got that no matter how exciting her life was, it didn't seem to be able to impact anything even remotely important.

...

Kanaya Maryam couldn't find her charge anywhere. She'd been looking for Feferi for nearly an hour now, and everyone she'd asked had been suspiciously tight-lipped about it. She was heading back to her quarters when she ran across someone she hadn't asked yet.

"Excuse me?" she asked, her diction flawless even through her breathing device.

He turned around. "Yes, Miss Maryam?" This was Marsus, seven sweeps old, a page, one of the few trolls here who didn't platonically despise her for being a landdweller in the Condesce's court.

"…I would like to inquire as to the whereabouts of Miss Peixes. I have been searching for her for the past hour and have yet to achieve success in my quest. She instructed me to remind her of her upcoming date, but I cannot find her."

Marsus's face returned to its usual fearful expression. "Well, I would like to tell you, but I'm afraid I haven't seen her either. Good luck with your search, though…" He wandered off, clutching his bag of memos with anxious fingers.

Kanaya thanked him as he walked away and then stepped into the antechamber of her respiteblock. She pressed a button on a panel on the wall, and took her breathing device off once the water had drained from the room. She stepped through another door and sank down into her favorite chair.

This was indeed troubling.


	9. Banter

Terezi and Karkat sat in the shade of the back of Karkat's hive. Terezi had let Karkat retrieve his sickles, on the condition that he not use them on her. Now he was idly swiping them through the grass and piling the resulting clippings on his knee. He was kind of disappointed he'd _still _never gotten to really use them.

"We should have murdered those grubfucking asshats," he said.

Terezi snorted. "I agree, but then we wouldn't have this head start, which we should really be taking advantage of." Her eyebrows lowered.

"Yeah, but it would be fucking _worth it._"

Terezi laughed, then paused. "…That's a really small pile."

"What?"

"Karkles, if _grubs _tried to use that for a feelings jam, they'd fall off."

"Don't talk shit about my pile. Maybe it's for ants. What then?" It wasn't even supposed to be a pile, but for some reason Karkat felt like defending it.

"Ants don't have feelings jams."

"Terezi, that's just because they don't have piles.

"Their hives are piles on the outside!" There was that shit-eating grin again.

Karkat stood up, knocking the very heap of grass they were arguing about to the ground. "We need a fucking plan."

"You're just changing the subject because you lost the argument. He he h-"

"Yes. I lost our worthless, pointless, waste of oxygen argument about fucking piles for fucking ants. But that pales into comparison to the looming threat that if we just sit around behind my fucking hive forever, someone will find us, convict us of treason, torture us until we're begging them to tear our fucking thinkpans out and put us out of our misery, then bury us alive, not even together, but all alone on completely opposite sides of the shitfucking planet and we won't be-"

"Karkles. If you don't want us to die apart or whatever you just said, then for goodness sake, _shut up._"

For a moment, Karkat was speechless, but not because Terezi had told him to be. Had he really said that? Yes. Yes, he had. "Look, Terezi, I only said that because…fuck."

"'Fuck' is not a reason. It's just a meaningless obscenity you really like using."

"It's just that you're the only troll in the pathetic, worthless, miserable pile of shit that is my life who I feel like I can trust. I mean, yeah, you're also the _only _troll in my shitstain of a life, but _still._ If I had to die with someone, I would much rather it not be some nooksucking asshole who would see me bleeding and denounce me as a mutant freak instead of letting us whisper badass one-liners to each other like we're heroes in a fucking war movie, or maybe something out of a production of Troll Shakespeare's epic romantic tragedy _In Which the Young Charges of Two Feuding Lusii Become Matesprits and-_"

"Karkles. If you want to survive, shut up. If you want to not reveal that you want me in one of your quadrants, also shut up. I even know which one now. Your feelings for me are so strong, I can practically taste them, and with every word you said of that title, they were getting more and more deliciously red…" Terezi was grinning maniacally now.

Karkat shut up.

"Alright. Now, what do you say we hitch a ride to the courthouse in whatever nearby city is biggest and take advantage of the crowd so we can abscond?"

He nodded.

"Good. Now just hold still for a moment. I need to put these handcuffs back on you."


	10. Departure

The nearest road was about a mile away. "Why is your hive so far from the road?" Terezi asked.

"I don't know. Why don't you ask whoever the fuck built it? They've probably been culled by now." Karkat stumbled for the fourth time in as many minutes. "Shit! Lousy goddamn stupid handcuffs!"

Terezi tsked. "I'm not taking them off. It's in case someone sees us."

"Well, they're making it really fucking difficult to walk."

"Sorry, but they're going to stay on your wrists until we can be sure we're safe."

Karkat narrowly avoided tripping again. He stopped suddenly and planted both feet firmly on the dusty ground. Terezi tugged on his arm, but he didn't budge.

"Why are you-"

"Take these fuckstain handcuffs off of me before I kick your nook through both moons!"

"Karkles, what-"

"Do I really have to repeat myself?" Karkat was practically screeching now. He realized he sounded like his lusus, but that wasn't going to stop him.

"No, but why-"

"Because with every passing second I feel more and more like the fucking Sufferer, and I-"

"I…I understand. And it's been bothering me, too… We're trapped by the lives and deaths of our ancestors, and it's a constant struggle to avoid falling into the same pitfalls they did."

"What the ever-loving fuck are you going on about?"

"Karkles, I thought you knew…I…I'm pretty sure I've deduced that the Sufferer was your ancestor…" Terezi was honestly stunned. Had that really never occurred to him?

"I'd never thought about it…" Karkat was speaking more quietly now that she had heard him speak before. "I always thought ancestors were a thing for pompous highblooded nooksuckers."

Terezi sighed, then disengaged the handcuffs. "We have to get going. I don't know how long it might be before someone starts looking for us. Come on, Karkles. …I won't put these back on until we get to the road."

…

Kanaya's husktop made a noise. She hadn't used Trollian in almost a perigee, so it took her a second to realize what the sound was. She opened the flashing window and was greeted by text in a slightly bluish violet.

-temerousMessenger [TM] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]—

TM: kanaya…? um, I just had an idea. you mentioned that Feferi had a date today…with who…?

GA: Eridan

GA: I Thought Their Matespritship Was Common Knowledge

TM: i guesss nobody reallly tellls me anything.

TM: um, anyway. you mean Prince Ampora…?

GA: Yes

TM: oh, um, I delivered a messsage to him earlier. i have no idea what was in the messsage, and wouldnt be alllowed to telll you even if I did know, but he seeemed reallly upset about it.

GA: Would You Say

GA: More Or Less Upset Than He Would Be If One Of His Quadrants Was Suddenly Empty

TM: i have no idea. this was the only time Ive met him, and I probably wouldnt know what that loooks like because its never happpened to me.

TM: i mean, Ive never had a matesprit or moirail, and Ive beeen with my kismesis since we were…

TM: um, Im reallly sorrry. i got sidetracked.

GA: Thats Perfectly Alright

GA: It Happens To All Of Us From Time To Time

TM: anyway, the point is that I dont know him welll enough to telll.

TM: if its any help, though, he seeemed kind of scary…

GA: Wait

GA: Marsus

GA: Did You Just Refer To Eridan As Scary

TM: um, yes.

TM: when he answered the dooor, he loooked like he was going to punch me in the face.

TM: and after he finished listening to the memo, he turned around and threw it at the walll. its prettty badly smashed. heres hoping I dont have to pay for it…

GA: You Are Easily Intimidated

GA: But Yes That Must Have Been Rather Frightening

GA: Hes Selfish And Moody But I Dont Think He Could Truly Be Considered Dangerous

TM: um, actuallly Im gettting reallly worrried that Illl get in deeep trouble just for tellling you how he reacted to the messsage.

TM: that might be confidential information…

TM: oh shit oh shit ooohhh ssshhhiiittt, what if I get cullled…? i dont want to die…!

GA: Please Calm Down

GA: Im Certain Its Nothing Major

GA: And Besides I Would Never Tell Anyone

TM: reallly…?

GA: Of Course

GA: And Even If This Transgression

GA: If It Even Is Considered A Transgression

GA: Is Discovered

GA: Feferi Would Undoubtedly Be Willing To Vouch For You

GA: If We Could Find Her

GA: Sigh

TM: kanaya… um, goood luck with your search. i have more memos to deliver now, so I have to go.

TM: maybe you could find Prince Ampora later and ask him about it if hes calmed down. just a sugggestion.

GA: Thanks Marsus

GA: I Believe I Will

TM: no problem.

TM: um. ‹›…?

GA: ‹›

-temerousMessenger [TM] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]-

-grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling temerousMessenger [TM]—


	11. Arrival

The four-wheeled device rumbled over another bump in the road. Karkat cursed loudly again, handcuffed arms flailing in an attempt to keep himself from crashing into the seat in front of him. His seatbelt was broken. The next time it happened, Terezi stuck her arm out to stop him from flying forward. He looked over at her, eyes filled with begrudging gratitude.

Their driver was a taciturn limeblood on his way to pick up his moirail, who was a witness in a trial taking place that night. Terezi had considered trying to start a conversation with him about that, but she was afraid she might slip up and say something incriminating, so she said no more than was absolutely necessary. And since the troll who had picked them up didn't seem inclined to talk much, the ride passed in merciful silence, except for when Karkat swore about the potholes.

When they arrived at their destination, Terezi thanked the limeblood with a nod (bowing to someone lower on the hemospectrum than herself would have been "unseemly") although she would have liked to do more because of how grateful she truly was. Karkat pretended to resist, feebly clinging to the doorframe of the four-wheeled device when Terezi pulled him out.

The courthive was a dreadful and imposing building, its marble and limestone façade stained with the blood of countless criminals and innocents. Everyone passing through its doors looked so young, most of them at least a foot shorter than Terezi and Karkat, who were both very small for adult trolls. And there were a lot of trolls coming and going, so many that they had to struggle not to be pushed apart by the crowd.

And yet it was almost eerily quiet. Terezi didn't seem to be fazed by it. She was used to this, but Karkat was incredibly unnerved by the unexpected hush.

"Why is it so fucking quiet?" he muttered.

"I've never really been sure," Terezi whispered, her voice almost a hiss. "Courthives just seem to give off an aura of…I always thought it was something commanding fear and respect, but now it just seems…ominous."

"You can say that again."

Terezi shuddered. "Actually…Karkles, I'm scared."

Karkat looked, really looked, at the legislacerator standing next to him. She was much less intimidating than she'd seemed an hour or two ago, and that now-familiar shit-eating grin was gone again. "All the more reason for us to get the fuck out of here."

…

Marsus scurried through the corridors of the Condesce's imperial palace. He had too many memos to deliver and not nearly enough time to distribute them all. For a moment, he wondered why messages weren't just sent electronically, but then again, if that were the case he wouldn't have a job and would probably be culled. Delivering messages was the only thing of value Marsus knew how to do.

As he was turning down a dark hallway in some distant, empty corner of the palace, his feet lost purchase on the stone floor and he stumbled. His face would have hit the stone, but falling is much less harmful underwater. The bag he was carrying swung wildly in his descent, spilling its contents onto the floor. He scrambled to gather the fallen memos, fearful that if anyone had seen that mistake, he wouldn't live long enough to become a full-fledged Messengeradicator. Fortunately there was no one else here…

Marsus realized one of the memos had activated when it hit the ground. There was no way to turn it off and no one here to see him, so he listened. It was a list of the names of trolls who were being ordered to be culled. None of them were anyone he knew, until the very end.

"…Kanaya Maryam, and Marsus Thagua."


	12. Realization

Kanaya tentatively knocked at the gilded door. It swung inward suddenly and violently, revealing a sore-eyed prince.

"Wwhat do you wwant?" he spat.

She shrank back slightly. "I suppose it's safe to assume you haven't seen Feferi…"

Eridan made a strange sort of growling noise. "You're Fef's govverness, right? So…Kan, you don't know where she is either?"

Kanaya shook her head, thinking about how it was kind of strange how he gave a nickname to anyone who wouldn't have him culled for doing so. "No. She informed me that she was going to visit you…"

"She wwas?" Somehow, Eridan looked both happy and more upset at the same time.

Before Kanaya could do anything more than nod, frantic footsteps began approaching. She turned around just in time to see her new moirail trip and nearly fall flat on his face. Marsus tried to get to his feet, only to stumble backwards and land on his backside when he saw Eridan glaring at him through the open door.

"Marsus, are you all right?" Kanaya wasn't entirely sure why she'd bothered to ask, considering that the answer was almost certainly no.

"N-no…" See?

"What's the matter?"

"Wwell, first of all-"

"Not you!" Kanaya shot Eridan an icy glare, then fervently hoped he wouldn't consider it insubordination.

"I…I…" Marsus clung to her sash.

"What is it?" Her voice began to become curt.

"Um, there's something I need to show you…"

Kanaya seemed to get the picture. "Will you please excuse us for a moment, sir?"

Eridan sighed, nodded, and retreated back into his respiteblock, shutting the door behind him.

Marsus fished the memo out of his bag and held it up. Kanaya had never seen him look so serious (or frightened) before. He glanced around to make sure they were alone. They were. "Listen to this."

The recording started up with the Condesce's familiar voice, haughty, feminine, sinister, and almost bored. "Attention. The list of those trolls within the jurisdiction of the Imperial palace who have been designated for culling is as follows: Eridan Ampora…"

Marsus and Kanaya gasped simultaneously, drowning out the next name.

"Prince Ampora is going to be culled?" Kanaya asked. "Why didn't you want him to hear that?"

"I didn't even know that," Marsus said, sounding stunned. "I didn't hear the whole memo when I accidentally dropped it, but…the last two names on the list are ours…"

"Wait, wha- oh my goodness."

Marsus started to shake.

"I'm going to tell him," Kanaya said.

"What? You can't! What if-"

"Look, Marsus…if my name and his name are on that list, it is undoubtedly because we're close to Feferi, and you because you're close to me. Prince Ampora has no reason to turn us in, as in doing so he would be signing his own death warrant in addition to as ours."

"But-"

"Marsus, the three of us are in grave danger, as well as Feferi if my suspicions are correct. Whatever we do, we must do swiftly."

Marsus nodded anxiously, placated but still terrified.

Kanaya rapped on Eridan's door again. A moment later he emerged, scowling.

"Wwhat is it this time?"

"Sir, we have very important news concerning your safety. Please, may we come in?"

* * *

blackrom space pirates next chapter, I swear.


	13. Encounter

The legislacerator and her pretend captive stumbled through the doors of the spaceport, exhausted. They didn't even have time to catch their breath before a gunshot rang out and something on the ceiling exploded.

"It's just one thing after a-fucking-nother today, isn't it?" Karkat complained, panting. Terezi brandished her cane, quickly sliding off the end to reveal a dangerous-looking blade. No longer using it as a walking stick, it seemed like she might fall over. It was pretty obvious neither of them would be in any shape to fight if it came to that.

Terezi grabbed the shoulder of the nearest troll who wasn't running in circles screaming. It happened to be a yellowblood, taller than her, who had an almost pleased look on his face right before he saw her. "What's going on here?" she asked him.

"Pirate attack! They've dethtroyed all the ships…but I gueth it juth delayth my inthtallation. Well, at leatht this way I get to thay goodbye to my matethprit…"

"Wait a minute," Terezi said. "Any psionic who has at least one concupiscent quadrant filled can't be forced to become a helmsman right now. The psionic population is too low this sweep."

"I…I didn't know that."

It certainly smelled like the truth. "I think you can go h-"

"Will you two assholes just shut up? We're being attacked by grubfucking pirates, and you're just standing there jabbering on about the legal system!"

Terezi was about to retort that no one was attacking anyone at the moment, but just then there was another gunshot, followed by a few shrieks of terror, and the crowd in front of them began to part.

"Could it be? I think it is!"

Terezi squinted, although it certainly didn't help her hear. That voice was maddeningly familiar. People scrambled away and the source of the exclamation made her way towards them. It was a tall ceruleanblood, dressed almost to the nines in gold jewelry with hair down to her waist. She was noticeably shirtless under her extravagant topcoat, which had one sleeve torn off for no apparent reason.

Terezi growled. "Vriska Serket. I should have known."

"Well, well. Looks like our little neophyte is all grown up."

"Spare me the blackflirting, Serket. I'm here to transport a fugitive." That wasn't a lie.

"As if I would want to!" Vriska scoffed. "And besiiiiiiiides, I already have a kismesis, and he's _much _more detestable than you. Speaking of him…" She paused to shout over her shoulder, "Taaaaaaaavros! What's taking you so long?"

The troll in question rolled into view in a wheelchair. He was lanky with well-muscled arms, but something about his expression suggested fragility. The long curved horns on the sides of his head had wide slits cut through his hood to accommodate them. "Uhhh…s-shut up, Vriska," he stuttered, "I can only go so fast."

As soon as he was within range, she leaned down to pull him into a rough kiss, full of teeth. When she pulled away, there was a streak of brown blood on her lips, which she licked at thoughtfully.

"For the love of fuck," Karkat exclaimed, "will one of you nooksniffers please kindly explain this ceaselessly imbecilic situation before my fucking thinkpan implodes?"

Terezi sheathed her swordcane with remarkable swiftness and rapped him on the head with it. "Hush, criminal." She flashed her short, sharp teeth in a grin.

"Awwwwwwww," Vriska said mockingly, "has the little legislacerator got herself a _plaything_?"

Terezi spat in disgust, and Karkat bristled at the way she said that word.

"I would never."

"Ha ha ha ha. I don't beliiiiiiiieve you."'

"Uh…"

"Seriously WHAT THE FUCK."

There was a strange silence for a moment, then Vriska said, "Well, this is just pathetic. Are you going to arrest me or whaaaaaaaat?" She rolled her eyes.

"I'm afraid I have more important things to do right now." Terezi tapped her cane on the floor impatiently.

"It's, uh, it's not like you can really go anywhere…"

"Because the only ship left undemolished in this miserable little spaceport is _ours_."


	14. Grasp

Feferi's eyes slid open. She had a splitting headache and it was probably because she'd cried so much that she could almost see a slight Tyrian tint to the whole room. Something was nudging her face.

"Cuttlefish!" It was. How had it gotten in here?

There was also a small plate of food nearby. When Feferi pulled it towards her, something slid out from underneath it. A memo, the smaller kind that used a holographic projection instead of having a screen.

Feferi reached over to pick it up and tapped its surface. A slightly grainy image of the Condesce appeared a few inches above the memo and began to speak: "Enjoy your last meal…" There was a sudden laugh, and then the message ended.

She started to cry again, which sharpened the pain in her skull to much more than the dull ache it had been a moment ago. The cuttlefish that had somehow found its way in here circled her anxiously, and Feferi stretched her arm out to touch it.

A thought sprang into her mind. "How _did _you get in here?" she asked, possibly rhetorically depending on whether or not it would understand her.

It certainly seemed to, as it swam out through the bars of the cage, and when Feferi crawled over to see where it had gone, it was floating next to a vent right underneath the ceiling on a nearby wall. The vent's cover sat on the floor beneath it.

She pumped her fist in excitement. So her work to train those cuttlefish had been a success, and now it might provide her with a means of escape! Feferi went to stand up so she could express her joy more strongly, but her horns jabbed bluntly into the top of the cage and it felt like someone had stabbed her thinkpan with a culling fork.

Once the excruciating pain had faded to a level where she could see properly again, Feferi crawled back over to where she'd left the memo and picked it up. She turned it over and depressed a small button on the back with one well-manicured claw. Before tapping on the front again, she made sure her hair was neatly arranged, not really certain why she was bothering.

Feferi held the memo, which was now in recording mode, at arm's length and started to talk, sniffling in spite of herself.

"If you're hearing this, I might be dead already. I mean, I shore hope not, but…I don't know if anyone will be able to find me! Still, it couldn't hurt to try." She turned the memo around so she could point it at her surroundings. "I don't know where I am, except that I'm in some sort of cage. But if anyone, frond, or anemone, could try to come get me, I would reely appre-sea-ate it! And if this is Eridan…" She put the memo down, facing her, making sure her hands were in the frame, and then formed her fingers into the symbol for matespritship.

…

"Wwell, an' here I wwas, thinkin' this day couldn't get any wworse," Eridan muttered darkly. "Looks like I wwas wrong." He found himself wishing he had a few knickknacks left to smash.

Kanaya nodded sympathetically and Marsus just continued to fidget.

"Now I'm cut off from Fef and I'm gonna die wwithout evver knowin' wwhether or not she felt the same wway about me…"

That page just wouldn't stop _fidgeting_.

"Wwould you cut that out!" Eridan shouted, causing the younger troll to emit a terrified squeal.

Before Kanaya could try to calm either or both of them down, there was a strange clanking noise and something clattered to the floor.

"What was that?"

Eridan stood up with the same confident and angry grace as someone whose doorbell has just been rung at an inconvenient time and strode over to investigate. He knelt down to pick up the fallen grate, and as Marsus and Kanaya turned to see what was going on, a cuttlefish swam out of the vent and collided with his forehead.

"Ow! Wwhat givves?" he muttered, rubbing his head. When he moved his hand back down, the purple streak in his hair was in disarray.

The cuttlefish dropped something and it bounced off of Eridan's knee on its way down. Grumbling, he picked it up and realized it was a hologram memo. He shot Marsus a sidelong glance. "Too lazy to delivver this yourself?"

Again, Marsus flinched. "I…I don't know what you're talking about…"

Eridan walked back over to the small cluster of chairs so he could show his matesprit's governess's moirail what he was referring to. The cuttlefish followed him. "Delivverin' these things _is _your job, isn't it?"

Marsus swallowed nervously. "Um, the holomemos aren't…they don't trust me with them; my rank's too low. You can look it up if you don't believe me…it's in my file…"

"Although I suspect said file may have already been redacted entirely," Kanaya interjected sadly.

Eridan sighed. "It's…it's not important. Anywway, wwhat's on this thing?" He jabbed a finger at the memo with an almost theatrical flourish and missed spectacularly. One of his rings struck the edge, so it activated anyway.

Marsus and Kanaya couldn't see the hologram from this angle, but they could certainly hear the message and see the anguish and pity, so much _pity, _in Eridan's expression.


	15. Strife

"Sweet mother of fuck." Karkat's frustration was rising exponentially.

"Quiet, Vantas." Terezi sounded dead serious, and it started to make him nervous. At this point, he would rather she call him Karkles. At least then he could be sure she hadn't just tricked him into thinking he could trust her, like he was some naïve little wriggler…oh god. If he needed to use his sickles, he wouldn't be able to with these handcuffs on oh god he'd been so stupid stupid st-

"W_ait _a minute," Vriska said, interrupting Karkat's inner panic monologue, "something seems oddly…famiiiiiiiiliar about this criminal you've got here, Pyrope. Why, if I didn't know any better, I'd say I'd seen him before."

"We grew up together," Terezi mumbled, no longer leaning on her cane but gripping it horizontally between fidgeting fingers.

"What was that?" Vriska asked, her voice teasing.

Terezi's grin was suddenly back in full force and the tip of her sword was pointing straight at Vriska's neck. How had she-?

"Can it, Serket."

Vriska swallowed nervously, then her face cracked into a smile wide enough to rival Terezi's.

"What's that look for?" Terezi moved her blade closer to Vriska's skin.

"Terezi, watch out!" Karkat shouted.

She swung around to deflect Tavros's lance. It flew from his grip and skittered across the floor towards the fleeing, panicking crowd, but before Karkat could warn her again, Vriska had Terezi in a headlock.

She couldn't use her sword effectively in this position, and Karkat was powerless to help her. "Fucking handcuffs!"

Terezi struggled to unclasp the pouch on her belt and dig the key out, then stretched her arm out towards Karkat. He dashed forward to her and she waved the key at the handcuffs, which disengaged and clattered to the floor. She was fighting for air now…

One quick sickle strike, clumsy but forceful, and Vriska released Terezi to hold her wound. Terezi leapt away to stand side by side with Karkat, while Tavros sat nearby looking as uncertain as ever.

Clutching her bleeding face with one hand, Vriska started laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny, bitchface? Karkat growled.

She ignored him, and addressed Terezi instead. "I never knew you could be such a _liiiiiiiiar_, Pyrope."

Although no one could see it through her veil, Terezi blinked. She was alert but still catching her breath.

"So you're in _cahoots _with this supposed criminal!"

There was no reason to continue trying to deceive her, especially since there was no one around anymore to witness and report Terezi's treason. "Hahahaha…ha…ha ha ha. You got me." She shrugged, grinning again.

"Uh…"

At this, Vriska seemed to suddenly remember that her kismesis was present. Without taking her eye (the one her hand wasn't covering) off of Terezi and Karkat, she remarked to him, "Tavros, you're just so completely uuuuuuuuseless in combat."

"Y-you're not much better," he retorted, "if you can't even, uh, fight two people at once, even though you have all your limbs working."

"Oh, fuck you," Vriska replied, and her tone of voice made it sound like she wanted to right then and there.

"Get a respiteblock!" Karkat shouted. He had nothing against public displays of concupiscent feelings, but he really, really felt like shouting at someone.

"We already haaaaaaaave one," Vriska gloated, "on our ship. Do _you _have a ship? _Noooooooo._"

"You're awfully cocky for a self-important bitch whose ugly-ass face just got maimed by a complete amateur." Karkat spontaneously decided it was more important to show how lame Vriska was than to keep up any pretense that he actually knew how to fight.

"Oh, this little scratch?" she scoffed, pulling her hand away to reveal a nasty gash between her eye and cheekbone. "This is nothing. And besides, I have faaaaaaaar too many irons in the fire to care about such a superficial wound. I think the only important thing here is…What exaaaaaaaactly is the deal with you two?"


	16. Agreement

Terezi sniffed around for a few moments before answering. She hoped that any security cameras that might be in this spaceport were the cheaper kind that monitored without recording, although it was a bit late now. "Fine. I took this assignment to detain some guy living too close to a juvenile lawnring and it turned out to be Karkat-"  
"Aaaaaaaah. Your old flushcrush, right?" Vriska smiled malevolently.  
"ASKJDFKSL." Terezi's response was as loud as it was unintelligible.  
Karkat was surprised but tried not to show it. He kept his sickles poised is case the stupid fucking pirates decided to attack again. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Tavros wheeling his way over to his fallen lance.  
"Yes, actually." Terezi cleared her throat and then resumed her explanation. "I felt sorry for him and-"  
Vriska interrupted again, this time just by snickering.  
"Vriska Serket, you know as well as I do that 'feel sorry for' is to pity as 'dislike' is to hate. Now let me finish my story before one or both of us decide to really slice your face up."  
Vriska grunted.  
Karkat glanced back over and saw that Tavros was struggling to retrieve his fallen lance without falling out of his wheelchair.  
"I've been having some…philosophical difficulties with the Alternian legal system lately, and the fact that this otherwise innocent troll was going to be designated for culling just because he'd decided to stay on Alternia to stay alive…well, that really clinched it."  
"So basically she fucking kidnapped me to save my life," Karkat summarized, mostly talking to himself. He hadn't really stopped to contemplate it until now.  
"How low on the hemospectrum do you even have to beeeeeeee for them to want to cull you no matter what you do?"  
Thankfully, they were saved from having to bullshit an explanation by the sudden occurrence of Tavors toppling over and landing face first on the floor.  
Vriska laughed so hard she fell over too, but considerably more gracefully. "Hahahahahahahaha hahaha-"  
"It's not my fault my, uh, horns are so big!"  
"Pffft hahahaha-"  
Karkat was poised to kick Vriska in the face. "Now, I'm not exactly a fucking expert, but I have to say, you two bulgelickers are the sorriest fucking excuse for pirates to ever take a dump on the already idiotic concept of piratehood! So far all you've accomplished is pointless destruction and wasting everyone's goddamn time! And I'm all for romantic gestures in any quadrant, but having to legitimately fear the distinct possibility that at any moment you assholes are going to pull out a bucket and do it right here is just so absolutely sickening that-"  
"Karkles."  
"What the fuck, Terezi? I was really on a roll there."  
Vriska had gotten to her feet and was now brushing the dust off the back of her coat. She seemed to be considering helping Tavros get back into his wheelchair, but decided against it for the moment. "You know what, Pyrope? I think I understand. After all, they didn't want me to have a lowblooded kismesis…so I said, fuck that, if I become a pirate, noooooooobody can tell me what I can't do. And besides, I want to get my hands on all the loot the empire has to offer. All of it." She paused for a moment to go aid Tavros. "So, whether you want to or not, as long as you're not going to arrest me…Get in, loooooooosers, we're going marauding."


	17. Preparation

"Kan, Mar, wwe're stagin' a rescue. Now wwhere the fuck is my harpoon gun?"

"I, um, might be able to answer that." Marsus was still a bit intimidated by Eridan. And he'd already given him a nickname…? "Did they take it from you when you first arrived?"

Eridan had come to the imperial palace from his jive on Feferi's invitation about a quarter-perigee ago. "Yeah…wwhen I wwent through security, they took it awway wwhen I wwent through the metal detector. I thought they were gonna givve it back, but they nevver did."

"So our first order of business will most likely be to retrieve and/or acquire our weapons, as Marsus doesn't seem to have one and, sir, it would appear yours has been confiscated. I have mine," Kanaya said, sliding her lipstick out of her strife deck but not even uncapping it, "but it can only be used in airlocked rooms, so I doubt it will prove especially useful."

"Just stop fuckin' callin' me sir. I think we passed the need for so much fuckin' deference wwhen wwe found out wwe're all gonna die. Now…it'll look suspicious if wwe're all seen wwanderin' through the palace together." Eridan went over to a nearby cupboard and withdrew three things from a drawer. They were top-of-the-line grubphones. He handed one each to Marsus and Kanaya and kept the third one for himself, which was in a case adorned with the same blue and purple stripes as his favorite scarf. "I havve no idea wwhy I evven havve these things. But they'vve got Trollian loaded up on 'em already, so wwe can split up an' communicate that wway."

**caligulasAquarium [CA] opened memo on board operation savve fef.**

**CA: testin testi **

**grimAuxiliatrix [GA] responded to memo.**

**GA: Do You Really Think It Wise To Use Such An Obvious Name**

**GA: I Mean Anyone Can View This Memo**

**CA: wwell wwhat do you propose i call it instead**

**TemerousMessenger [TM] responded to memo.**

**TM: um, maybe just some random word?**

**GA: Ah There You Are**

**TM: yeah, sorrry. it toook a while to figure out how to work this thing.**

**CA: you knoww wwhat **

**CA: this is stupid**

**CA: wwere in the same fuckin room**

**CA closed memo.**

They looked up from their grubphones, Marsus nervous, Eridan irritable, and Kanaya graceful but uncertain.

"I'm gonna start a new board," Eridan said. "I'll tell you wwhat it's called as soon as I think of it."

Several long moments passed while he seemed to be trying to come up with a name. Then a few more moments passed. Kanaya adjusted her breathing device to a more comfortable position and Marsus fiddled with a loose thread at the hem of his breeches.

Eridan spun on his heels to face them again. "Do somethin' useful!" he snapped.

Marsus yelped and tore the thread right out. Kanaya just sighed.

"You guys think of a board name! I'm gonna go…dispose of this holomemo."

He returned nearly ten minutes after they had come up with something suitably vague, eyes still leaking violet despite his best efforts to hide it.

…

Vriska and Tavros lead Karkat and Terezi towards the back of the empty spaceport, every footstep echoing off metal as gray as their skin.

Karkat kept shooting Terezi nervous glances. He wasn't so sure these two could be trusted. Sure, she smelled the lemon-bright flashes of his eyes flicking towards her, but she didn't say anything. So Karkat was left to walk alongside her, thinking about what he knew about Vriska and her past history with Terezi.

He vaguely remembered that she had crippled Tavros in a classic example of juvenile blackrom stupidity (he hoped he'd never been that moronic when it came to romance), then nearly killed his FLARP teammate in vengeance for some act of revenge on her part. Then apparently Terezi blasted her arm off somehow, although Karkat couldn't see anything wrong with either of her arms. And then she'd mindcontrolled Terezi into staring at the sun…

"Like what you seeeeeeee?" Vriska asked suddenly.

Karkat looked up. They were still walking down a corridor towards the main hangar. "We haven't even gotten to your stupid ship yet. Unless your thinkpan is so broken you think you can flirt with me."

Vriska huffed. "You've been staring at my arm, dumbass!" She turned around to face him, walking backwards now. When she bent and unbent her elbow and wrist a few times, Karkat realized the movements weren't smooth enough to be natural. "Pretty impressive, huh? We're trying to get the same sort of thing done for Pupa's legs, but I'm not going to let it happen until he earns a large enough share of our collective loot to pay the freak himself."

Speaking of Tavros, he seemed to be doing just fine keeping up, but that certainly hadn't helped him in their little tussle.

"We're heeeeeeeere!" Vriska sang, spreading her arms out wide to indicate the ship behind her. "Welcome aboard!"


	18. Boarding

It was smaller than Karkat had been expecting, but just as battered as he'd imagined it. Part of him wanted to laugh at just how pathetic their ship was, but another part of him was afraid it might completely fall apart at any moment. He reconciled these two warring opinions with a simple "What a piece of shit."

"Excuse me?" Vriska put her hands on her hips and glared at Karkat.

Tavros looked every bit as incensed as his partner in crime, but made no move to defend the honor of their vessel.

"Karkles, that is incredibly rude!" Terezi chided. "If you insult their spacecraft, they may be tempted to leave you behind…or worse."

Karkat hmphed. He highly doubted they were competent enough to do anything to him that would qualify as that 'or worse', but didn't want to push his luck just for the sake of insulting them. Instead of responding, he just took another look at the ship in question.

It appeared to be a small, cheap, piece-of-crap ship, enlarged and possibly almost slightly streamlined by a patchwork of spare parts and scrap plastic cobbled onto it. Some of this plastic was used for cut-out letters, attached high up on the near side to spell out "Mindfang" in Old Alternian, a language now used only for ceremonial purposes, architectural adornments, and religious texts.

"You named your ship after your FLARP character?" Karkat jeered.

"No," Vriska insisted, "both this ship and the persona I used for that game are named after my notorious ancestor, the Marquise Spinneret Mindfang!"

Karkat gave another apathetic grunt.

"We, uh, picked this name because Vriska's ancestor was really badass, and she was in a quadrant with my ancestor, although they were red and we're obviously not…and he was equally badass, if not more so…"

"Tavros, the Summoner was _not _more badass than Mindfang!"

"He, uh, killed her…"

"You're not supposed to kill your m_ate_sprit, dumbass! And besides, it was prophesized! She knew he was destined to end her life, but that didn't stop her from joining with him in what would be the greatest matespritship of their era! That makes her _more _badass."

Whether Tavros was about to make a rebuttal or not, Karkat decided it was half past time to cut this idiocy short. That almost seductive snarl that was developing in Vriska's voice was getting incredibly irritating. "Fine, what the fuck ever. Let's just get on with whatever the hell we're doing."

"Fiiiiiiiine. We'll give you the grand tour. Watch your step."

Vriska snapped her fingers with a metallic click and part of _Mindfang'_s paneling lifted away like the wings of a beakbeast in flight. One more snap, and a set of steps extended itself from the ship's doorway to the spacedock they stood on. She strode up these stairs with a swagger that was as exaggerated as it could be without looking stupid. Her companions were left vaguely uncertain, except for Tavros, who sighed and pressed a button on his wheelchair. A ramp slid out over the steps and he wheeled up it with practiced ease. Once he was through the doorway, the ramp went back in, uncovering the stairs.

Terezi sniffed at the open door. There would be, she knew, a drop of at least the height of a two-story hive underneath those narrow stairs. And there was no handrail to speak of. She turned to Karkat and said, "Karkles, please help me up these stairs."

"Terezi, for the love of fuck, can't you climb five goddamn steps on your own? You didn't have any trouble with the ones on the way in here."

She frowned. "Listen here, buddy. If I fall off the side and die, you'll be shit out of luck. Vriska wouldn't hesitate to turn you in for a bounty if she knew about your blood and I wasn't here."

Karkat reached for Terezi's hand. His fingers were warmer than that of even the lowest rustblood, and she could feel the heat of his palm through his glove. She could also feel (and smell) the blush spreading across her cheeks, and hoped he couldn't see it.

As they climbed the steps, Terezi realized she could have done this without his help, but she wasn't about to tell Karkat that. Actually, it almost seemed like it probably would have been safer that way. He wasn't very good at this whole leading people up stairs thing. But she didn't really mind as long as Karkat managed to keep her from falling to her death. It was nice having someone she felt she could truly trust for once. It had been far too long.

* * *

Sorry for the delay; I was busy with end-of-senior-year things, getting caught up on Homestuck (I'm actually still behind; I'm on Act 6 Act 2 now), etc. Updates may continue to be somewhat sporadic because I'll be getting my AO3 invite in a few days and plan to use that as a mirror for this fic. Why would that make updates slow, you ask? Well, I intend to somewhat rewrite each chapter I have so far and include illustrations in them for it on AO3 while I'm continuing to write new chapters to post here. That's going to take a while because I'm not confident in my ability to draw complicated compositions and am afraid my subpar digital coloring skills might turn people off of this over there, plus the fact that I can't find my tablet pen, need to clean my room, and may have a part-time job soon. But never fear. I've put far too much time and energy into this thing (it's longer than even any original fiction I've ever tried to write got) to abandon it now that I've gotten it rolling.


	19. Beginning

Once-ordinary hallways now stretched out to terrifying distances. Every second lost to the palace's sprawling layout was another second in which something awful could be happening to Feferi, as far as their fevered minds were concerned. But although Kanaya was incredibly worried, Marsus was actually physically shaking in fright, and Eridan was simmering with anger, they knew they had to stay hopeful.

…

As those whose doom she'd arranged searched frantically, Her Imperious Condescension paced back and forth in front of her throne. She knew exactly the sorts of mad ideas her would-be successor was entertaining, no matter how hard Feferi tried to keep them secret. Less strict hemocaste regulations, full desegregation, culling law reforms of an utterly unprecedented magnitude… it was completely insane. Next thing you know, she'd be wanting _peace._

As much as she hated to admit it, crushing rebellions had kind of lost its fun, and she was starting to get a bit too old for it anyway. She was going to nip this one in the bud; cull it before it even left the caverns, so to speak.

…

Marsus knew the layout of the palace like the shape of his own fins. It was his job to, after all. But fear is highly disorienting. Still, he was doing an admirable job of keeping said trepidation under control.

He hit a dead end and stopped to notify Kanaya and Eridan on his progress.

-temerousMessenger [TM] opened memo on board Team Excesssivvely Radical Kids-

TM: i cant for the life of me figure out where shed be.

TM: and I know prettty much every rooom in the palace.

-caligulasAquarium [CA] responded to memo-

CA: wwell its not like wwevve looked everywhere yet noww is it

CA: wwe gotta keep lookin

-grimAuxiliatrix [GA] responded to memo-

GA: Eridans Right

GA: We Simply Cant Afford To Stop Searching Yet

CA: thanks kan

CA: an believe be im kind of an expert wwhen it comes to knowwin wwhen its time to givve up

CA: like i havve it down to a fuckin SCIENCE or somethin

GA: Anyway Dont Worry

GA: Im Sure Well Find The Heiresss Favorite Cuttlefish In Time For The Gala Ball

TM: um, what cutttlefish…? theres going to be a balll…? nobody ever tellls me about this stufff…

GA: Shh Just Go With It

TM: oh, sorrry. i forgot.

CA: wwoww mar really

GA: Alright Alright

GA: Were A Team And There Will Be No Infighting Permitted Whatsoever

GA: Now Do Either Of You Know If Guards Are Posted During The Day

TM: i dont know firsthand, but Id be willling to bet they are.

TM: securitys gotten a lot tighter lately for some reason.

GA: Oh I Was Thinking Perhaps We Could Inquire If Theyve Seen The Cuttlefish In Question

CA: as if

CA: the other day i wwanted to go for a stroll an my fuckin door wwas locked from the outside

GA: Well Thats Unfortunate

TM: there dont seeem to be any around now that we could ask, though…

CA: alright wwell this convversation is startin to become a waste a fuckin time

-caligulasAquarium [CA] ceased responding to memo-

GA: Yes I Suppose We Should Return To Searching Now

GA: Good Luck To The Both Of You

-grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased responding to memo-

After a brief moment of fumbling with the touch-screen interface, Marsus closed the memo with a sigh and began to turn around. Standing over him was a dreadfully beautiful, curvaceous tyrianblood more or less literally swimming in hair and opulent jewelry.

…

The interior of Vriska and Tavros's ship was no less patchwork than the outside, but was considerably shinier. There were bits of stolen finery, broken magic eight balls, and, more oddly, a few Fiduspawn plushies scattered her and there in the chrome-and-duct tape dining block they'd entered directly. Terezi figured a ship this small probably wouldn't have room for a big fancy entryway. Karkat, on the other hand, was still too busy trying to figure out how the fuck he'd ended up in this situation to make conjectures about spacecraft design.

Tavros and Vriska were both seated at a round table bolted to the floor in the middle of the room. Without looking up, Vriska remarked, "It took you two longer to get in here than it did Tavros." She rose, pushing her chair back as she stood. She was wearing an eyepatch now, not that she really needed one.

Tavros put down the crossword puzzle he'd been working on. "So I guess it's time for the tour, then…?"

* * *

Runaway Justice is now also being posted at AO3 in an updated version with illustrations! I'm trying to work back and forth between this version and that one, so updates may continue to be slower than they used to be.  archiveofourown works /439290


	20. Hope

"Heiress…?"

"You're not going to turn me in, are you…?" Feferi adopted a guarded stance, wishing she had her 2x3dent.

"O-of course not." Marsus shook his head. "How…"

Feferi tentatively ran her fingers over one slightly cracked horntip. "I think whoever locked me up underestimated my strength and resourcefulness. But…augh, my head really hurts…"

"A-are you alright? What happened?"

"I don't know…I just…woke up in a cage, like a fish caught in a net. I…I can trust you, right?"

"Of course!" Marsus glanced around anxiously. "Her Condescension wants me dead, too…and Kanaya and Eridan!"

"Oh no! Are they alright?"

"I talked to them on Trollian under a minute ago," he said, holding up the grubphone, "so I sure hope so."

"May I?" Feferi held out her hand.

"C-certainly. Just let me put the board password in once you log in, and you can talk to both of them."

Marsus was finally starting to get the hang of this thing, it seemed.

**-cuttlefishCuller [CC] opened memo on board Team Excesssivvely Radical Kids-**

**CC: )(ello?**

**-caligulasAquarium [CA] responded to memo-**

**CA: oh cod fef is it really you**

**CC: Of course it's me, s)(elly! 38)**

**-grimAuxiliatrix [GA] responded to memo-**

**GA: But We Thought**

**GA: Well We Couldnt Find You Anywhere**

**CC: W)(ale, Y-ES! But )(ere I am.**

**CA: wwhere wwere you**

**CC: I, u)(, got lost and stuck somew)(ere! 38(**

**GA: So Our Suspicions Were Accurate Then**

**CC: I t)(ink t)(at depends on w)(at your susfis)(ions were!**

**CC: Wow, that sounds R-E-ELY STUPID! 38|**

**CA: but youre fine noww right wwhere are you wwe wwere so worried especially mee**

**CC: I'm somew)(ere in t)(e palace. Luckily I stumbled across a messenger w)(o lent me )(is grubphone so I could let you guys know I'm okay! 38)**

**GA: Would The Name Of Said Messenger Happen To Be Marsus By Any Chance**

**CC: )(ang on, I need to ask )(im…**

**CC: Acs)(elly, Y-ES!**

**GA: Say Hello To Him For Us Would You**

**CC: S)(ore, I'll do that!**

**CC: Marsus says )(i too!**

**CA: so anywway wwhere are wwe gonna meet up**

**GA: It Would Indeed Be Paramount To Ensure We Reconvene Undetected**

**CC: )(ang on, I t)(ink I )(ear someone coming! 38( **

The heiress and the messenger were approached by the unmistakable clack-clack-clack of an imperial guard's boots, slowly but steadily getting louder. Marsus dashed to a nearby door, a supply closet by the looks of it, and tried to open it. He spent a few seconds frantically turning the knob back and forth to no avail. Feferi had to move his hand out of the way so she could pick the lock with one of her hairpins.

Feferi and Marsus tumbled headfirst into the small room and hastily shut the door, more concerned with escaping detection than anything else. They listened as the footsteps continued to draw nearer and then passed with only the slightest pause.

"Are they gone?" Marsus whispered.

"I think so," Feferi answered quietly, slowly getting to her feet. "But they'll shorely return, so we can't afford to go back out into the hallway."

"So what are we g-going to do…?" A panicked edge was beginning to form in Marsus's words, but he kept his voice down.

He looked over and saw that Feferi had already discarded her outfit's slightly tattered trailing skirts on the floor and was standing on top of a stack of boxes. He tried not to look at her clad in just her puff-sleeved leotard.

She wrenched the cover off a vent on the wall and offered her hand to Marsus to help him up.


	21. Flight

Vriska lead the way, followed by Tavros, with Karkat and Terezi bringing up the rear. As they made their way that were apparently not important enough for commentary, Terezi whispered to Karkat, "What do you suppose they're even up to?"

"I wouldn't even begin to have the slightest fucking clue what these two imbeciles are doing," he hissed in reply. "Or, for that matter, how in the name of this pukestained planet we managed to run into a couple of old friends/enemies of yours."

Terezi shushed him, as his voice was getting slightly louder with every word. At any rate, their hosts seemed to have either not noticed them muttering or just didn't care.

The procession suddenly halted, and Karkat cursed loudly as he walked straight into the back of Tavros's wheelchair.

"Sorry…"

"Tavros, don't apologize!" Vriska chided.

Her copilot opened his mouth as if to speak, then thought better of it and just nodded.

They stood in the doorway of what was certainly the largest chamber in the ship. On a series of control panels lining the curved walls, numerous lights flashed amidst an array of dials, levers, switches, buttons, and meters. Karkat and Terezi boggled vacantly at the instrument panels for a few moments before turning their attention to _Mindfang_'s plasma windows. They could just discern something moving gradually towards them outside.

Karkat suddenly realized Vriska had been talking this whole time, but chose to continue ignoring her (on purpose this time). He turned to Terezi and whispered, "Do you see that?"

He immediately regretted it, expecting to be upbraided for his poor choice of words. But the blind legislacerator just stepped over to the windows, pressed her angular face against the plasma glass's plastic coating, and gave the horizon a good sniff. After a moment, she nodded gravely.

Karkat joined her and took a closer look himself. "Oh, for fuck's sake," he muttered, "First you arrest me, then we get forcefully recruited by a couple of braindead pirates, and now _this_!"

Vriska turned and gave a histrionic sigh. "You two weren't even listening, were you?"

"Is this ship ready to fly?" Terezi asked brusquely.

"Of course it is!" Tavros answered, a hint of pride in his voice. "But, uh…why do you want to know?"

"That's why," Karkat grunted, pointing at the imperial armored four-wheeled device that was making its way straight towards them.

Feferi and Marsus crawled on their hands and knees through the palace ductwork. The younger troll struggled to keep his messenger bag on his back and his eyes off of the heiress's backside. He soon gave up on the latter, if only because if he didn't look forward he couldn't see where they were going.

Marsus almost jumped when Feferi's voice suddenly echoed around him, "Do you have any idea where we are?"

He shook his head, then realized she couldn't see him. "N-no, I don't…wait a minute." He stopped crawling and pulled his bag down to dig through it. Feferi stopped too, trying to turn around in the narrow space so she could see what he was doing.

The flow of Marsus's borrowed grubphone was almost painful in the darkness of the ventilation duct. He hastily turned the screen brightness down and opened Trollian.

**-temerousMessenger [TM] opened memo on board Team Excesssivvely Radical Kids-**

**TM: kanaya…? eridan…? are you there…? i just neeed to let you know that were alright, but we dont know where we are right now.**

**TM: we crawled into the ductwork…**

**-grimAuxiliatrix [GA] responded to memo-**

**GA: I Dont Know For Sure If Eridan Is But I Certainly Am**

**TM: you have no idea how relieved I am to even just hear from you…**

**-caligulasAquarium [CA] responded to memo-**

**CA: yeah mar im here too**

**CA: wwell not the same HERE as kan but i think you knoww wwhat i mean wwithout me havvin to explain it**

**GA: Unfortunately I Doubt We Can Help You If You Dont Know Where You Are Yourselves**

**TM: oh… i seee. welll, thanks anyway. dont worrry, welll be fine. **

**TM: besides, I have another idea…! eridan, do these grubphones have a navigation appp…?**

**CA: of course they fuckin do its right next to trollian on the menu**

**TM: excelllent…! do you think its precise enough for me to telll where Feferi and I are in the palace…?**

**TM: never mind, Ill figure it out for myself. **

**GA: If You Can Get It To Work Perhaps We Should Reconvene In Eridans Chambers**

**GA: Theyre In An Easily Recognizable Location So It Shouldnt Be Hard To Find**

**TM: yes, I think thats a goood idea…!**

Vriska rushed to the window and practically rammed her face into the plasma glass. Closing her normal eye, she glared intently at the approaching vehicle. Imperial armored devices were well-known to be slow but had frightening range. "Yeah, we definitely need to get the hell out of here. Tavros! Start the engines!"

The ship lurched as it sprang to life, nearly knocking Terezi and Karkat to the floor. They clung to each other's arms for balance.

Vriska dashed from control panel to control panel, flipping switches, pulling levers, checking displays, and spinning dials at a feverish pace. _Mindfang_ began to ascend suddenly, leaving the spaceport behind and narrowly evading a shot from the imperial landcruiser that fell short at the last second. Karkat and Terezi stood there numbly as the ship continued rising, and didn't quite realize they were still holding onto each other until it stopped. They exchanged awkward, blushing glances and let go, stepping away.

The cerulean-blooded captain pulled a large lever down firmly, locking it (and the ship) in place. She stepped back from the windows, wiping imaginary sweat from her forehead, and her passengers went over to look out.

The cruiser was far beneath them now, well out of range, hardly more than a tiny black speck - or, in Terezi's perception, a single grain of pepper - on the dusty Alternian plains below.


End file.
